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A Big Step for ADDCA, a Bigger Step for ADHD Coaching
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
By: Duane Gordon
“Take the attitude of a student, never be too big to ask questions, never know too much to learn something new. “
Og Mandino
Coaching is a partnership of equanimity and curiosity. Both the coach and client are equal partners in the process. The coach facilitates a process of exploration and discovery focused on “who” the client is and “what” the client truly wants aligned to their “who.”
Questions are the coach’s currency and the coach’s gift to the client. In the word “question” is the word “quest.” The coach is on a quest to empower the client to find new clarity and awareness.
The coach invites the client to participate in the process through the powerful platform of questioning. A coach who asks powerful questions provides the client with a natural pause to pay attention to evocative questions that can stimulate their brain. Questioning places the responsibility of the answer on their client.
The coach will actively listen to their client’s words, beliefs, actions, emotions, ideas and more. Based on what is conveyed, the coach will respond with more empowering language and questions to continue a disciplined conversation that will move their client forward.
Clients with ADHD have been told what to do so many times that when they are asked to think for themselves, for what matters, for what they are interested in and what’s important to them, it opens up a new, uncomfortable entrance directly to the center of their heart.
Questions are not only intended for the rationale side of the brain, they are also intended to invite exploration into the deep core of the client’s spirit. A compassionate coach is sincerely curious about what the client wants and encourages them to identify and cultivate their own habits of the heart. This is done through powerful questioning which empowers the client to discover what they want and need to support their true authentic self.
When the coach is sincerely curious without any judgment of “who” the client is and “what” their supposed to do, they will be empowered to honestly respond to questions posed by their coach.
Where else can a person with ADHD sit down with someone on a weekly basis who is totally focused on “who” they are and “what” they want to do in harmony with their essence?
A curious, well-trained ADHD coach will create an environment where powerful sincere questions will “cause a pause” for the client to pay attention to the parts of their life they never knew existed. The ADHD coach will compassionately challenge them to pursue it.
Telling the client won’t make it happen permanently. Asking the client the right questions and letting the silence pervade will promote an honest response. Powerful Questioning is what will ignite the client’s process of discovery and eventually provide clues to their unique, inner greatness.
How do you structure your day? Do you start every morning off by doing the things you have to do but don’t necessarily enjoy and put off the more enjoyable parts of your day until later? Most of us spend very little time doing the things that we do best. Since we tend to enjoy the things we do best, but we still spend most of our time doing things that we don’t really enjoy.
Instead, we spend the majority of our days struggling to do things that we don’t like to do. Then we wonder why we don’t want to get out of bed in the morning to go to work. Working this way drains your energy and decreases your ability to succeed at what you are trying to accomplish.
If you have ADHD, the things you do best need to be the things you do first. Of course those things you choose to do, at work or in school, need to have a positive intention of moving you forward and not wasting your time. Our brains are stimulated and focus better when we are asked to take action in areas of interest. The greater the interest the greater the attention we use and the greater our intention of directing our energy towards manifesting it. The ADHD brain engine is even more ignited and gets revved up when we focus on tasks projects or goals that are of high interest and generally but not always lead us to our concealed strengths. Once you discover your naturally reoccurring patterns of success and integrate them, with specific areas of interest, amazing things begin to happen right before your very eyes.
Unfortunately, the reverse is also true, The ADHD brain does not gain momentum by focusing on challenging, intellectual tasks that inhibit our ability to process information or prevent us from taking action. The more challenging and unstimulating the task the more difficult it will be to get our brains activated so that we will take the necessary action to complete important assignments. This has been consistently proven in PET brain scans conducted by Dr. Zametkin of the NIMH since the mid 1980’s. Using PET scans which measure brain metabolism, an indicator of brain function, he was able to show how two test groups of ADD and non ADD brain functioned in areas of interest and non-interest. The brain scans consistently illustrated that ADHD and non-ADHD brains performed well in areas of interest and strength. However, when both of these groups were asked to focus on completing tasks of intellectual challenge that were mundane, the pre-frontal cortex, responsible for executive function, organizing, prioritizing, decision-making, etc. worked well for the non-ADDERs and consistently shut down for the individuals with ADHD. Even though the individuals with ADHD wanted to complete the task, it became increasingly difficult to concentrate and the harder they tried the more their brain would continue to shut down. It wasn’t that they did not want to do the task or were lazy. In fact the opposite was true. They really wanted to complete the task and understood the value of doing it. The harder they tried the more it immobilized their ability to focus and take action. Interest makes a huge difference in an ADDers ability to gain any kind of forward momentum with tasks, assignment and projects.
If you are an adult, entrepreneur, business executive or manager with ADHD, It is important to rearrange your schedule doing the things you enjoy the most – which are usually the things we do best. My experience has consistently showed me that the first things you do to start your day can make or break your day. Rather than feeling drained before 10:00 am, you’ll be more productive, have more energy and sustain your focus during the course of a challenging day. You will feel as though you have accomplished something early in your day and it will fuel positive emotions and energy that will sustain you for the rest of your day.
If you have not listened to the March 9th interview with Dr. Russell Barkley and Jeff Copper, ACG, PCC of Attention Talk Radio, you NEED to go listen to the recording - Click here to listen
This interview is the best one that I have heard in my 15 years of coaching individuals with ADHD.
Dr. Barkley brilliantly and powerfully conveys his work and research on how emotions impact ADHD. If you listen to it. I can guarantee you will receive tremendous benefit and will want to integrate into your life immediately.
Click here to listen
One of the many coaching distinctions we use in our training program at the ADD Coach Academy is piece vs. peace.
ADHD may sometimes feel as though you are being bombarded by many thought simultaneously.
Your brain is only capable of process one thought or idea at one time in space.
When you pay attention to ONE piece of your personal puzzle, versus many pieces, you will have PEACE all the time.
To find out more: http://www.ADDCA.com
This years ACO conference, APRIL 29-MAY 1, 2011, is going to be totally ADD. It will also be TotallyADD as in the same people of Rick Green fame who have produced well know videos such as http://www.youtube.com/user/TotallyADD check it out.
Ava Green producer, co-creator and wife of Rick Green will be at the ACO conference telling her magical story and..
has been given the OK to offer many of their products at bulk pricing. Another wonderful reason to attend this years ACO conference. To find out more or register go to: http://www.adhdcoaches.org/conference-2011-registration
Acknowledgment and thanks need to be expressed to ADDCA alumnus Candace Taylor, ACG, who negotiated on behalf of ACO to make this part of the conference a reality. Thanks Candace. We already know your greatness!!!
ADDCA Coaches: ADDCA CONFERENCE APRIL 28, 2011, All ADDCA coaches: We are limited to the amount of registrations, so please register as soon as you have determined your plans.
ADDCA Conference (April 28th), please click the link below:
http://www.mcssl.com/SecureCart/ViewCart.aspx?mid=288172F1-5CCE-4C04-9A0C-87988E3466B3&sctoken=9146c86a9b0d41389cf04ae33af78aac&bhcp=1
If you plan to make hotel reservations you must do so as soon as you can, since last year the hotel filled up quickly.
To register for the Sheraton 4 Points hotel, please call Reservations at 847-671-6000—
We will be sending out email broadcasts with updates regularly. Please watch for the latest news.
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